--Should we require the children to be put in separate 
                 classrooms? 

                 Most parents look at the school situation and their own 
                 children, then make this decision. Many schools don't have 
                 three classes at each grade, so the choice becomes all  
                together or 2/1 split, which is less preferred. The parents with  
                 their kids in the same class have reported no trouble at all with 
                 making separate friends or being seen as a unit; they also 
                 found it to be convenient for assignments and conferences. If 
                 one child has a self-esteem problem, however, constant 
                 comparison to his siblings could be detrimental. 

                 --What kinds of things should we ask the teachers to 
                 do/not to do to encourage individuality among our  
                   children? 

                 Most parents asked that their children not be referred to as 
                 "the triplets," and then trusted the teacher to do what was 
                 appropriate beyond that. There are occasional problems with 
                 being asked to share "goody bags" on special occasions or how 
                 to celebrate birthdays individually, but small problems will 
                 occur in school whether you have siblings in the same grade or 
                 not. 

                 --One child is significantly behind the others  
                     academically. 
                 Would it be too damaging to hold him/her back a grade? 

                 Being held back a grade is often difficult for a child to accept 
                 in any family. The question becomes whether it is better than 
                 being behind for twelve years of school. One family held all 
                 three back after kindergarten, since they had a late birthday 
                 and one child hadn't passed the readiness test for first grade. 
                 Another family held back one child, who later was diagnosed 
                 with ADHD, and felt they did the right thing since he would 
                 have been compared to his sisters all through school. Often the 
                 other kids aren't aware that your children are triplets or 
                 quads, so it's not as big an issue as you might think. 

                 --How can we balance encouraging individuality with 
                 wanting them to be in the same activities for sake of  
                 our schedule? We can't possibly get to two events at  
                      once. 

                 This may not be as much a higher multiple problem as a large 
                 family problem. Just as adults have to set priorities and make 
                 choices, children can be asked to limit their activities to ones 
                 that fit in with the family's schedule. One family has a meeting 
                 when choosing activities for the upcoming season and lets 
                 everyone have his/her say. Sometimes children wind up 
                 attending every session of an activity they didn't choose to 
                 participate in due to childcare needs, so they might want to 
                 know of this possibility ahead of time.